Without realizing it, many of us carry pain from our past that holds our minds, bodies and spirits hostage. While we don’t want to ever completely erase our past – as it’s shaped us and is an important part of our personal history - there IS a benefit in facing past pains to gain freedom in the here and now.
When you sit down and look at the past with a totally open mind and perspective, it’s ok to admit that yes, parts of it were shitty. But then consider the lessons it taught you (of which I’m betting there are many!).
This act of pausing and reflecting helps you gain a new perspective, which also enables your resilience muscles to grow. And resilience is best cultivated from facing our shit and realizing it didn’t kill us.
After facing the past and reflecting on the lessons learned, the next key factor is to release the pain. Sharing what you are feeling is the best way.
Not sure that’s the case? Well, think back to a time you had something eating at you, giving you that horrible heavy feeling. I bet the moment you connected with someone and started sharing, that heaviness dropped away and you felt SO much lighter. Yup – I love that feeling!
Recently, I felt that heaviness move in on me. I really didn’t want to bother anyone with how I was feeling, but I also know that pain diminishes when we open the door on it and allow the light in. So I shined a light by calling on a dear friend and within minutes, I felt so much better - particularly when she smartly reminded me the story I was telling myself was an old played out bullshit story!
The other benefit of opening up and sharing is that allows us to see the situation from a different perspective. This can open another important door that allows us to develop compassion for ourselves.
I know many of us have been told the story that to be vulnerable is to be weak. But I’m here to tell you my friend, that’s a completely false story. Being vulnerable takes tremendous courage, and helps us build our resilience and strength muscles even further.
The flip side to being open is to remain silent and hold everything in. But by failing to express the pain, we only add more to our heavy load. Plus when we internalize our emotions, they can begin to manifest as physical ailments.
We’re at a time where it’s more important than ever to keep our immune systems and bodies strong. A great way is by starting to express yourself and releasing whatever pain you may be holding. This will be a process, but take it one step at a time and you will begin to feel so much lighter.
So today my beautiful friend, if you’re feeling a heaviness, please reach out to someone you trust and feel safe with and share. I promise you will feel SO MUCH BETTER when you open the door on your pain, and allow that beautiful shining light in!